Pursue a relationship
Should you date a coworker? If you still want to move forward, research shows that your intentions matter. Many companies prohibit employees from dating coworkers, vendors, customers, or suppliers, or require specific disclosures, so be sure to investigate before you start a relationship. Lots of people meet their partners at work , and yet dating someone in the office is often frowned upon. Some companies even have explicit policies against it. So what if you and a colleague have been flirting and might want to explore a relationship?
How to Approach an Office Romance (and How Not To)
Pursuing relationships as your authentic self starts with discovering who you are. Take a self inventory by reflecting on your strengths, weaknesses, values, and goals. Building your confidence and self-knowledge will help enable you to form and maintain authentic relationships. Surround yourself with people who value uniqueness and accept you for who you are. Let your true self shine in honest, meaningful, and authentic relationships.
Log in Facebook. No account yet? Create an account. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. By using our site, you agree to our cookie policy.
Article Edit. Learn why people trust wikiHow. Tasha is affiliated with the Dwight D. There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. Surrounding Yourself with the Right People. Letting Your True Self Shine. Related Articles. Method 1 of Take a self inventory. Think of qualities that drive you and define your character. You could reflect on values like honesty, humor, a sense of duty, or independence.
You could also recognize other traits or talents, like being good at a sport, drawing, or playing an instrument. Come to terms with your weaknesses. An essential step in becoming your authentic self is recognizing that no one is perfect, and learning to accept and love yourself exactly as you are. Learning to appreciate how they make you unique will help you show up as your authentic self in relationships.
This doesn't mean you need to be "stuck in your ways. This doesn't mean, however, that you should be ashamed or hide this part of you. You might say to yourself, "I have a short temper, but I still love and accept myself. Find goals that serve your best interests. Instead of doing things to look good for other people, pursue goals that are rewarding, fulfill lifelong dreams, or express your values.
Examples might be learning to paint, reading a book every week, traveling, or gardening. Pursuing goals that express your authentic self will help build your confidence and self-knowledge. These qualities will help you avoid misrepresenting yourself just to please others. Note that this doesn't mean making money or losing weight are inherently "fake" goals. You may want to make more money to support and provide for yourself, or you may want to lose weight to be healthier.
The key is to examine your motivation for these goals — are they truly for your benefit and something you want, or something you feel you're "supposed" to do or want? Keep a journal. Journaling is an effective way to get to know yourself. Take 15 to 20 minutes a day to write about your experiences and how they made you feel. Once every week or two, read back your entries to review your thoughts.
Think of finding authenticity as an ongoing process. Remember that discovering your authentic self is a journey without a fixed destination. We all proceed through phases of authenticity and inauthenticity throughout our lives. Ongoing self-examination will help you pursue and maintain relationships as your authentic self.
Method 2 of Evaluate your interactions with other people. We tend to represent ourselves most authentically around people we know well. Pay attention to how you interact with your family, close friends, and acquaintances. Writing in your journal will help you keep track of how you interact with various people.
Spend time with people who make you feel comfortable in your own skin. No one wants to walk on eggshells around their friends or romantic partner. They want you to change how you talk and to listen to different music just to be their friend.
Don't give in. Honor and be proud of how you talk or the music you like. You might say something like, "This is how I talk. There's nothing wrong with it — it's just different. You can accept that or not accept that.
It's up to you. Choose people who value uniqueness. Pursue relationships with people who appreciate individuality and appreciate your uniqueness. Being authentic involves being comfortable with the qualities that make you a unique individual. Inauthentic people only want to please others and change themselves to conform to a norm, which destroys everything unique about them. For example, if your friend pressures you to dress in ways you don't like or makes fun of activities that you love, they're not an authentic friend.
Go for quality over quantity. Build authentic friendships with a smaller number of people instead of trying to be friends with everyone. Choosing a limited number of people who accept you for who you are will allow you to let your authentic self shine.
You should be yourself around both, but put your effort, trust, and commitment into your relationship with your best friend. Method 3 of Try not to lie to people. You become friends and eventually start dating, but they still have no idea that you misrepresented yourself. Even if it was a little white lie, it was still an inauthentic way to pursue a relationship.
Have meaningful conversations with your friends and family. Try not to settle for small talk, especially with those closest to you. Talk about your dreams, beliefs, fears, the world, and other complex subjects to deepen your relationships.
You could talk about childhood, your cultural traditions, or what you hope to do with your life. Pay attention to how you feel when you have these conversations. If you begin to feel a little uncomfortable perhaps you notice that the person you're talking to disagrees or disapproves of what you're saying , try to push through and continue the conversation.
This is good practice for you to learn to be your authentic self, even when challenged. This doesn't mean you have to be rude or defiant, just don't veer away from a disagreement or change your opinion because someone disagrees. You should still be open to other points of view and ideas.
The person disagreeing with you may have great points and ultimately change your mind — there's nothing wrong with this, as long as you are not just coming around to their view point because you are uncomfortable being in disagreement.
You may find that the more you get used to being open, honest, and authentic, the more others are willing to be authentic with you. Challenge your friends and let them challenge you. As you become more comfortable being your authentic self, you can use your new skills to lead and inspire others. You and your friends can each other to pursue authenticity and live thoughtful, examined lives. An authentic friend tells you the truth, even when they disagree with you. Remember that the relationships you pursue help you stay authentic.
Our loved ones help us see our blind spots and challenge us to stay true to ourselves. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Related wikiHows. About This Article. Co-authors: 6. Updated: April 2, Categories: Relationships.
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 4, times. Did this article help you? Yes No. Cookies make wikiHow better. By continuing to use our site, you agree to our cookie policy.
When going out into the world (or, more often, the internet) to seek love and companionship, most of us decide to date someone based on how. When we jump into a relationship too soon, we're often setting ourselves up for disasters. But how do we know what "too soon" is?
Pursuing relationships as your authentic self starts with discovering who you are. Take a self inventory by reflecting on your strengths, weaknesses, values, and goals. Building your confidence and self-knowledge will help enable you to form and maintain authentic relationships. Surround yourself with people who value uniqueness and accept you for who you are.
Are you single and looking for love?
When going out into the world or, more often, the internet to seek love and companionship, most of us decide to date someone based on how they make us feel, or based on attributes we seek in someone else. We think about the person we want, and, once we find them, assume a lasting relationship will organically take shape from there.
8 Reasons You Can't Pursue a Relationship
A lot of people wonder why they cannot pursue relationships with the people they like. Many of them start to believe there is something wrong with them, and let their self-esteem go down. The reality is relationships are something that happens naturally and spontaneously and usually people who are highly anxious about relationships and overly self-conscious tend to have more difficulties when meeting and connecting with people. To begin connecting with someone, you need a decent amount of self confidence. When you are quiet and withdrawn from people they tend to overlook you. There is nothing wrong or shameful about being open about yourself and your human need to connect with people.
What Does It Mean to Be ‘Ready’ for a Relationship?
Six months after her divorce, Jo Carter, a project manager at a university in Madison, Wisconsin, thought she was ready to date. She had married her high-school prom date a year after graduating from college, and they were together for 19 years before splitting up. I just sat there looking at my computer thinking, What just happened here? But there was a whole lot going on in my brain that I may not have been consciously aware of. It was another six months before I went on my first date. According to Stephanie Coontz, a professor of history and family studies at Evergreen State College, this is likely because of a reversal in how people think about marriage and commitment that occurred over the course of those decades. A relationship is what made you ready for adult life. As a result of this, and of the gay-rights movement, one societally acceptable path to family life branched into many. Now many see marriage as a capstone , a cherry to be placed on top of the sundae of all the other ways you have your life together.
A good relationship can be hard to find.
From good listening skills to not holding you back, there are many signals your partner likes you. For the rest of us, modern dating is a minefield.
What It Means to Pursue a Love Interest
Being in a relationship has its perks: you always have a designated cuddle buddy and someone to talk to about the Game of Thrones. Too often, especially in the beginning of a relationship, couples start to do everything together. Hanging out with your S. While I would love to be with my partner every second of every day, I still cherish my time spent alone. It gives me time to clear my head, get work done, and practice self-care. Pro tip: Remember those things you did before your partner? Keep doing them. I have a cafe I visit religiously to get my work done. After being in an unhealthy relationship where cheating was involved, it can be challenging to not jump to conclusions the next time around. Pro tip: Practice self-love and positive affirmations! You are awesome and deserve all the good things that come into your life! Not being impulsive with money is always a great skill to have, but as we all know, the first stages of a relationship can be filled with impulsivity. Of course, you want to impress your new bae, and impulsive dates are the best kind of dates, but if you do that stuff too often it quickly becomes equivalent to another bill each month. Having an idea of what your spending limits are is extremely helpful when planning dates. Pro tip: There are a variety of apps that can help squash unhealthy spending habits.
10 Life Skills You Should Have Before You Get Into a Relationship
Feel free to listen HERE…. If you want anything in life, you should go after it. Create a game plan, and go after whatever it is. At least not really good things. Again, the only way to get what we want is to simply go after it.
